Woman explains the beautiful feeling of 'sonder,' or realizing random strangers have full lives

February 3, 2026 - 11:49

Have you ever paused in a crowded airport or a bustling city street and been struck by a sudden, overwhelming thought? It’s the realization that every single person around you is living a life as vivid and complex as your own. This isn't a moment of loneliness, but one of profound connection known as "sonder."

This concept, defined as the understanding that each random passerby has a life just as intricate as one's own, is a beautiful and humbling emotional experience. It is the opposite of feeling like you're on "The Truman Show," where the world revolves around a single narrative. Instead, the world expands exponentially.

In that moment of sonder, the barista becomes not just a server, but a person with dreams, worries, and a history. The stranger on the bus is carrying their own private joys and sorrows. Each person is the main character in their own epic story, with supporting casts you’ll never meet and plotlines you’ll never know. This awareness can dissolve feelings of isolation, replacing them with a quiet sense of wonder at the sheer scale of human experience happening simultaneously all around us. It’s a reminder of our shared, if silent, journey, encouraging both empathy and a deeper appreciation for the fleeting moments we all inhabit.